5 Tips for stalking problemsNico van den Dries
Stalking is a major problem in the Netherlands that we really want to solve. Of course, we already solve many things for it together with Thijs Zeeman TV program Zeeman Confronteert and above for the program Gestalkt. But we also want to help the rest and that is why we give 5 Tips for problems with stalking cases.
Figures show that 1 in 4 women and 1 in 13 men has experienced some form of stalking. Usually the stalker is someone who knows the victim, an acquaintance, ex-partner, family member, colleague or friend. The problem is that stalking is unpredictable and dangerous. It has turned out that every situation is different and therefore it is difficult to say what to do.
Giving in to stalking is never (ever) the best option! If you admit it will always continue, even responding (or having someone else respond) will only further frustrate the perpetrator and limit the punishability.
The following simple tips and options will help you deal with and perhaps get rid of stalking without causing any further harm to yourself, your family, colleagues and / or business.
Tip 1. Collect as much evidence as possible
Most important in stalking cases: the evidence. Record every action, really every action, with a video camera and write everything in a 'log' (notebook). Don't forget anything, no matter how small the action may seem. Register every little detail with date and time. Record (telephone) conversations, take clear screenshots of messages. Feel free to ask your environment as a witness to put things on paper for support.
Tip 2. Be clear to your immediate environment about what is going on
There is really nothing to be ashamed of. Notify neighbors, friends, relatives, and close colleagues. Ask them to keep an eye on them so that they too can record evidence. However, just let them know about the common problem - stalking - and don't divulge further details; a stalker is often close to this group of people.
Tip 3. Contact a professional
A specialist such as Strongwood knows how these things work, how a stalker works and what the best options are to expose and stop the perpetrator.
A specialist can work with you for:
Keep in mind that the police can only act if there is real cause for it or if a criminal offense has been committed.
Tip 4. Contact the police
Obviously this is a way to counter the stalking and make the stalker pay for his / her actions. The disadvantage is that there is little attention for these kinds of matters by the police and that something can only really be done if something really criminal has happened (such as destruction). When you contact the police and the case is serious enough for them (there must therefore clearly be a criminal offense), an investigation will follow to find and prosecute the perpetrator (s).
Tip 5. Be especially good with the stalker
Dealing with a stalker? That sounds strange, but it is definitely something to consider. There is no point in ignoring stalking, the stalker then assumes that you don't mind or that you are afraid. Actively combating stalking often requires a lot of time and energy. Stalkers are slow to give in and often try to put the blame on their victims.
In short: if the stalker is known, inform him exactly what you want and especially what you do not want. Be very clear and consistent with the stalker: no is no!
Furthermore, it is important never to respond to the stalker's proposals or demands. A stalker almost never keeps his word. Don't assume the stalker will change: stalkers don't change. Never start a conversation with the stalker, not even by text message, email or app!
Consult a specialist to help and don't do it yourself.
Are you being violently stalked? Or do you not know if you should take the stalking seriously? Then confide in someone. Call us or take a look at the links below.
Do you have questions or need specific advice? Do not hesitate and call us